What type of bike do you ride?
2006 Specialized Allez Sport, 56.5cm

What is your best time in the 100-yard freestyle?
You cannot measure my rhymes in terms of distance.

Height/Weight/Sex/Age?
Tall/Heavy/Hermaphrodite/Like a Fine Wine

What is your favorite quote from RAGBRAI? Who said it?
"HA! That's fingernail polish! Who's the dummy now?!" --JJ, after I informed him he had lipstick on his teeth

What is your favorite drink?
Vodka/Gatorade

Have you ever made love to a man? If no, then would you?  Explain.
No, but I once dated a girl whose ex-boyfriend was her live-in step-brother for as long as she could remember. I broke up with her approximately 12 seconds after I discovered this.

Favorite music group?
Slipknot.  End of discussion.

What is your golf handicap?
When I once hit a tree with a cart, I bumped my head and acted retrarted for awhile.  Still do, actually.  True story except for the golf cart/tree part.

Hometown?
Carroll, Iowa

Favorite College (hint: the only answer is Iowa State)?
Go 'Clones!!

Whom do you look up to? Why?
Nobody, I don't enjoy nose hair.